Finally free, all I wanted was for these scars to go away. Their shame was tempting to give into at times. I just wanted them to go away.
Faintly there, only I can see them, I'm sure. But, they bothered me. They were a reminder of what I had done.
Not until my friend told me a story did my perspective change.
She told me that she had a friend who had cut. She prayed that the scars would go away, but they didn't. When she saw that they weren't going away, she began to change how she saw them. She saw them as a tangible reminder of what God had done and how He had redeemed her. She saw them as a celebratory thing, instead of a sorrowful, shameful thing.
A while back, I was talking to my roommate, saying that it bothered me when I saw my faint scars. She told me to think about what I wanted to remember about God when I saw them.
I had not come up with anything until I heard this story from my friend.
These scars are a tangible testimony, my testimony, of where God has brought me from and what He has brought me out of. They are a testimony of deliverance, freedom, redemption, healing, and of a divine love that no one can understand.
When I see these scars from now on, I will let out a prayer of thanksgiving and praise. These scars will be my testimony and I will not be ashamed of them. When I see them, I will celebrate because my God loves me.
Mindy - I love this story about the scars. Thanks for sharing it. It is so true that all of life revolves around our attitude towards it - how we view the good and the bad -- seeing the scars as where we have come from rather than relfecting on the cause of the scars and trying to hide from the truth they remnind us of does not help - only seeing the beauty in the scars are we truly free to worship Him and thank Him for those scars. So true, so true.....Love you sweetie!
ReplyDeleteI don't know if you read PostSecret, but there was one last week that basically said they wished people would see her scars as a sign that she survived, instead of as a reminder that she almost didn't. I, too struggle with the scars I can see...I don't know if they're visible to anyone else, but they're all I see when I look down. I used to hate them, just constantly reminding me of how much I used to hate myself...but now it's a reminder of how far I have come, and how Jesus has helped me through these horrible times.
ReplyDeleteHope you're doing well, super inspiring!
Stay true!
I know this is an older post, but it struck me and I just wanted to tell you that it's encouraging, cherie... God's been showing me a couple things about scars, because I have some of my own. Basically, everything we do in rebellion against God's best for us leaves scars. Some of us, like you and me, may wear those scars on the outside. They may look like cuts; they may look like stretch marks; they may look like a tattoo or a piercing done for the wrong reasons at the wrong time. For some people, it's purely internal--a scarred heart: Their scars aren't things other people can see outright; to be detected at all takes someone else with a great deal of insight to see, "She responds that way because of THIS issue in her heart." But when we overcome those issues, those hard times, those sadnesses-- it's like a victory. We become our own battle heroes, with battle scars to show. "THIS is what my God has done. Yeah, I used to have this problem, and my body (or my spirit) still shows signs of that. But because there is no condemnation for me in Christ, I want you to see these scars, understand what I've overcome, and know that God can do the same in your life." Scars become part of our testimonies-- we all carry them, just differently. You're on the right track to sharing God's work with others... keep it up, and kudos for being honest. :) He who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it.
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