Worship - An Audience of One

I've been challenged lately by my own thoughts about worship. Here are the questions floating through my mind:

-What would churches be like if we really did worship unto the Audience of One?

-How would my worship be different if I didn't care what other people thought or thought of me?

-Why does my worship need to be dignified?

I am finally sitting face to face with these questions and I find myself thinking of David Crowder's song, Undignified. If you've never listened to it, the video is at the end of this post. It's a great worship song that talks about becoming more undignified 'than this'. Here are the lyrics:

I will dance
I will sing
To be mad
For my King
Nothing Lord
Is hindering
This passion in my soul

Chorus:
And I'll become
Even more undignified than this
Some may say
It's foolishness
But I'll become
Even more undignified than this
Leave my pride
By my side
And I'll become
Even more undignified than this
Some may say
It's foolishness
But I'll become
Even more undignified than this
Than this

La, la, la, la, la, HEY!
La, la, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la, HEY!
La, la, la, la, la

It's all for You my Lord!

So, is this about pride? I think so. Webster's definition of pride is 'a high or inordinate opinion of one's own dignity, importance, merit, or superiority, whether as cherished in the mind or as displayed in bearing, conduct, etc.' Hmm....  Jesus gave up His dignity when He was crucified on the cross for us, so can't we give up ours for Him?

I know that for me, every week in church is a battle for my pride. I have so experienced God in such a real way that my soul is shouting for joy, but because of pride, my mouth won't. I want to jump up and down and worship so wildly, like King David dancing before the Lord, but my pride stops me. "What will everyone think of me?" is the question that always runs through my head during church. 

But, I'm not worshiping them. My worship is not for them. So, why should I care what they think if I jump up and down or shout at the top of my lungs? It's not like it's not in the Bible. "Shout for joy..." Psalm 98:4, "Let them praise His name with dancing..." Psalm 149:3. 

Leave my pride by my side.... My King deserves my worship. Now, let me clarify something. I'm not saying that this is how everyone should worship. I'm sure that for some people, leaving their pride by their side involves lifting their hands, not necessarily dancing wildly. Everyone worships differently. I'm talking about setting pride aside and not caring who's watching or what anyone thinks, but having that love and madness inside of us for our King Jesus that we refuse to let our pride hold us back. 

I am definitely challenged to start worshiping to the Audience of One. I'm challenging myself to lay my pride by my side and let my worship reflect outwardly the way I feel toward my King. 

Baptism

 Today was a very significant day. It tied together the last 6 or so months of my life. 

The decision to be baptized had been in the making since July 18th. I received a voice mail that day from a woman who works at Sierra Bible Church, the church I'm attending here in CA. She told me about the baptism service being held on August 5th and wanted to know if I was interested in participating. At first, I dismissed her message, as I had been baptized before. But, as the day wore on, the thought of it wore on my mind. 

I had been baptized before, when I was in middle school or something, but I don't remember the date or year. It really didn't mean much to me then, either. But, the decision to be baptized today held much significance. 

2 Corinthians 5:17 says, "If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!" (NIV & NLT combined) This is me. I decided to be baptized today because it represents so much. So many things happened in my life in the time I spent at Mercy; my life was transformed there. God became real to me. I had always been a 'Christian', but, had I? I was so double-minded at times and my faith wavered. My walk with God was anything but stable. I was in and out, up and down. One day I hated Him, another I needed Him. I blamed Him for my pain, thinking He was the author of it. I didn't think He loved me and I didn't know who I was. 

But all that is changed now. I have always been redeemed, but I'm living like it now. Being baptized today was my declaration that I am, from this day on, living in the resurrection life that Jesus Christ died to give me. The old man really is gone. I am new! Before Mercy, I was dead. Now, I'm alive. 

I shouldn't have received that voice mail about baptism. I never filled anything about about being interested in baptism, nor did I say anything to anyone about it. But, I don't think it was a coincidence. No, with God, nothing is a coincidence. He ordained my baptism today.