Letting Go of the Oars

Last weekend, God showed me something. 

I saw myself in a boat with oars headed down a river with a heavy flow. I had the oars in my hands, using all of my strength to try and row myself back up-stream, when really I need to let the water carry me where it needs to take me.

I know God has been trying to take me places in Him and in this healing process that I'm terrified to go. I think I'm afraid of the unknown and lack of control. He is asking me to trust Him, but I've been saying no because of fear. I've been so afraid of the process that I've been fighting it and trying to make things happen on my own.

On Sunday, I was at the altar, asking God why He wouldn't just take the oars away. He told me that if He took them away, He'd be taking my choice away.


I have the choice to continue to fight and use all of my strength to try and row back up-stream, or I can let go of the oars and trust that He will take me only where He wants me to go, trusting that His plan is good and that He is with me and that He has me and isn't going to leave, but above all, trusting that He is good.

I realized tonight that by fighting against the flow of His waters by trying to row against them I'm wasting my energy. Wouldn't it be better to rest and let Him carry me where He wants me to go?

By letting go of the oars, I'm letting go of my fears and placing my trust in the One Who deserves it.

(Fear doesn't deserve my trust. What has it ever done for me?)

Shining Your Brights

It's funny the things God uses to speak to me about spiritual concepts. It's also interesting how many lessons we can learn from driving. For instance, "You can't drive forward while you're looking in the rear-view mirror" translates to, "You can't go forward while you're looking backward". Here's another one:

On the way home tonight, I was following a car that had their bright lights on. I learned from a friend months ago that when I'm so many feet behind a vehicle, I should not have mine on, so I kept them off. I was close enough to the car in front of me, though, that their bright lights actually helped me to see better, too. 

I realized that in life, we need to let our brightest light shine so that those who are following us can see, too, because their lights aren't bright enough. Maybe their light isn't bright enough because of brokenness or because they don't know the Lord, or any other number of reasons. But they need our lights to shine so that they can see. 

Matthew 5:16 says, "...let your light shine before others...". The whole verse is, "In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good deeds and give glory to your Father who is in heaven."

So, come on, let your light shine; turn on your brights. You never know who may be following you. 

Split in the Path

I went running the other day on a trail that's new to me. It wasn't marked very well and I found myself lost a few times. In a few places, the trail split off into two different directions, leaving me unsure of which one to go. I chose one and after running down it for a few minutes, realized it was probably the wrong direction. So, those times I realized I had more than likely gone the wrong direction, I backtracked and followed the other direction the trail led.

I had recently downloaded a pedometer onto my iPod and was using it to track my mileage during my run. As I was thinking about it, I realized that my pedometer didn't stop counting my steps when I had to backtrack, but it added to them.

Sometimes, the trail we are on isn't clearly marked, and we are faced with a split in the road and the decision of which direction to take. We might take one direction, thinking it was the right one, only to realize it wasn't. So, we backtrack and go the direction we should have gone.

But, God doesn't discount the steps we've already taken, though they might have been in the wrong direction. He doesn't get mad at us when we falter and lose our way, but because of His grace, mercy, love, and kindness, He uses those experiences/steps to our advantage. He uses the things we learn on that wrong trail to teach us so that they can be used on the path He wants us to take.

Not only this, but He'll use us to help others to know which direction to go and not to go. We've already run the trail, and we know which direction leads the right way.